The time traveller’s recipe:
You will need;
- a bundle of clothes in organic cotton
- 1 g of opium
- 10 cl of white lead
- 1 vial of compressed coal ashes
- 50 splinters of a second hand stake
- 10 years of wars which have not occurred
- resistance of a collector transistor
- 2 ml of vaccine against rabies
- a piece of molten magma or meteorit
- a sheet of papyrus
Note: Of course the list is not exhaustive depending of the chosen period of destination.
- Book the organic cotton clothing as you will need it later to cross the space-time continuum in good conditions. Make sure to use only 100% organic clothing.
- Using your knowledge about history and an encyclopedia in case of you have doubts gather ingredients that precisely refer to your era of destination. Warning, anachronisms could wreak havoc by disorienting the universal clock of time.
- In a mortar pile together the opium, the compressed coal ashes and the white lead. Then add one by one the splinters. To sweeten the taste, pour a slight coffee spoon of sugar cane.
- In a separate bowl, melt the 10 years of wars whcih have not occurred with the vaccine against rabies. Then you should incorporate the collector transistor’s resistance to spice the previous preparation.
- Melt together the two preparations in a shaker. Break the magma (or meteorit) in pieces. Cut wide stripes of papyrus to compose false springs rolls. You should pour the mixed preparation on the papyrus first then put the magma (or the meteorit) on top of it and wrap carefully the papyrus around.
- Cool your appetizers in the refrigerator for 24 hours. Taste it with your closest friends in the event this meeting would be the last. Because of the opium’s effect you’ll fall asleep a few hours after. You will wake up if the time travel has succeeded safely… or not!
- Good night and good luck! By the way do not forget to take with you a vial of radioactive sea water to come back to the future. See you later sailor!